The emptiness that is my life is all that directs me. Resting in the meaninglessness of life I press on. Who am I? Who I was, who I dreamed that I could be - meaningless in light of who I am. The wind blows and I, like chafe, am scattered and thrown. In my naivety I make choices daring to dream that they have value - that too is illusion. My choices are made in blindness, ignorance, and futility. We, society, are a mass of vain, blind, animals wandering this way, blown that way. Is there a divine providence guiding the scattering winds? Can one tell from the apparent randomness of our lives - to some, comfort, to others pain - to all a measure of suffering.
Here I am in this journey of life. I live, I act - a hollow shell existing towards non-existence. Birth to death. Is death to be feared? To be embraced? Does death offer any more meaning than life? Any less?

A conversation I had today at work via email - I found it a bit entertaining. It began with a harmless discussion about our hockey pool.....

I think it is ironic that he lost by the same technicality he boasted about last year! Maybe there is a god after all! :)

Pagan … there is only one God and his name is God … not god.


Well, in fact the early disciples did use the name Zeus at times to try and convey the concept of god (or GOD if you prefer), but they found it tended to confuse the poor pagans that already knew a Zeus, so they tried Logos, but that too was already in current pagan use. What to do, what to do. It’s almost like the idea of almighty god existed and, no matter what title we use it has generally already been used. I guess some would suggest that Jesus is as good a name as any and, since it had not until later been considered a divine name, it seemed like a good place to camp. Perhaps it is significant that Jesus was such a common name in those days, making it easier to present the idea that god/God/GOD had indeed deemed it fitting to reach out to mankind and to make his divinity within reach of the common man, not just emperors, priests and kings.
Alas, I’m sorry that my paganism caused you such grief and righteous indignation (you know, Christian indignation killed a lot of people over the years!), but I intended no insult. I simply assumed (erroneously it seems) that you were of a more enlightened mind and would overlook my clerical error. Again, I apologize.

You have known me how long and you assumed enlightenment? Such a lapse in judgement … :)

If dreams are gone
Life still goes on
The grave does beckon still.

Death will call
Whether great or small
To live requires great will.

In the face of death
Take one more breath
And brave the lonely hills.

Leave behind what snares mankind
Dreams, desire, fear.





Follow each breath to where it leads
In each moment, life you’ll find.

Hold not tight to broken parts,
With each breath the whole you’ll find.